Is it wrong to want your husband to send you flowers or anything at all...?

My husband and I married in January 08 and in March he deployed for a year. We dated for almost a year before we got married and he got me flowers the 2nd week we started dating. Nothing in this relationship has been conventional at all...I take care of his 5yr old daughter full time as well as my 5yr old daughter and 4yr old son. I have just noticed this mothers day when my gift was a nightie set, that he justified as a mothers day gift/miss you/on sale online. What brought this ? on is that i just recieved calls/text from other guys in the unit wanting to send get well flowers to one of the gal%26#039;s from the unit here who is like a sister to everyone. The guys have lots of downtime before they go overseas and I get phone calls from my husband almost daily and he tells me all the cool stuff they all do, and here i am..putting up with **** from his ex,paying off his bills from years ago and taking care of a home and 3 kids full time and working...Am I being selfish here?

Is it wrong to want your husband to send you flowers or anything at all...?
no...but... he should send you them without you asking..
Reply:No, it is not wrong to want that stuff. You are going to want to have a talk with him and let him know how you feel. Contrary to popular belief, men can%26#039;t read your mind. When he is back in the States, I recommend some marriage counseling to get you two started off on the right foot again! Good luck!
Reply:No your just like every other military wife and like most of the others once he is home full time and he doesn%26#039;t change you will be divorced and he will find his next ex-wife.Good luck
Reply:I didn%26#039;t understand anything you wrote.





He got you a nightie for mother%26#039;s day but you really wanted flowers so you are upset?





And you%26#039;re jealous that a girl who is obviously sick is getting flowers and you aren%26#039;t?





I really don%26#039;t understand. Sure he has downtime but do you think its easy being overseas in Iraq away from the people you love fighting a dumb *** war? No.





Put it this way...all he wants is a supportive wife at home and instead he gets a wife that is crying over flowers. Is that fair?
Reply:its probably not really even flowers you are seeking but i little appreciation for what you are going through at home.. some recognition of your dedication and sure flowers would be nice but what you really want is some validation from your husband that your doing a great job and he couldn%26#039;t do it with out you.... ..
Reply:guys are not mind readers, let him know how you feel, plus the party%26#039;s over, you got married, he feels he doesnt have to win you over already, call him up and tell him it would be nice to receive flowers once in a while, cause he doesnt have a clue about how you feel
Reply:It is your right to feel however you want, but it is never a good thing to set expectations for anyone other than yourself, you will contiunally be disappointed, as I am hearing in your note. The only thing you can do is tell him what you want or need and how you are feeling. And do not compare his first marriage/wife to yours, it is never ever a good thing to do. You must remember that everyone is not like you and doesn%26#039;t think like you, so you can%26#039;t expect him to do the things you do. Be grateful that he sent you something, lower your expectations now or you are going to live a life of disappointment.



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