Should the guy always pay on dates?

This might sound dumb, but...





When I date a girl, I tend to pay for EVERYTHING. And I like paying...





Especially on the first date, I could never imagine expecting a woman to pay, or split the check...





I think I always pay fo things and shower women with gifts and flowers because...





(1) I%26#039;d feel weird if they paid





(2) I think I have low self-confidence.





I%26#039;d say I%26#039;m a good-looking guy and I know how to treat a woman, but something in my past has caused me to feel that I need to %26quot;pay%26quot; and create big %26quot;surprises%26quot; and buy them %26quot;Flowers %26amp; gifts%26quot; to keep them around.





I know that women like a challenge and a guy that pays for EVERYTHING and gives gifts is NOT a challenge.





I%26#039;d like some advice on all of this, but I also don%26#039;t want to get used to changing my style too much because if I date someone for long enough, I don;t want to turn into a jerk who%26#039;s fogotten how to bring flowers, or give a special gift %26quot;on occasion%26quot;.





Any good advice? I%26#039;m working on the confidence.

Should the guy always pay on dates?
Who ever asks for the first date should pay for everything on that date for sure. Neither should pay for everything ALL the time.


You do not need to constantly %26quot;pay%26quot; and come up with %26quot;big surprises%26quot; all the time.


Flowers and gifts do not keep someone around unless they are a gold digger.


Going overboard on such things makes you look desperate and can get creepy. Women feel like you are trying to buy them and make them feel obligated to stay with you - not a good thing.


Gifts and flowers are fine when done in MODERATION and after the relationship has progressed some. Too much, too soon=realtionship failure, do not go overboard, do not judge present or potential future relationships from the past, women are different.


Treating a woman well, respecting her on every level, including giving her her space at times means a lot more than just constantly spending money to try to impress.
Reply:I think that it%26#039;s really up to you about what you feel comfortable with and what she feels comfortable with. If she lets you pay without too much protest, then I think it%26#039;s fine for you to pay. But, if she really insists that she pay, then you need to let her sometimes. Otherwise, you%26#039;ll be making her uncomfortable. And, you don%26#039;t want that.





The one exception to this, in my book, is the first date. I think that the guy should always pay, simply because then it sends the signal that this is a romantic interest, not just friends.





I don%26#039;t think a guy who pays or brings flowers is %26quot;not a challenge%26quot;. I think he%26#039;s a gentleman! The only thing is that you don%26#039;t want to come on too strong on the beginning. Don%26#039;t scare them off by bringing multiple gifts / flowers during the beginning stages. Just my two cents.
Reply:I used to believe in a guy always paying. I have now come to the conclusion, after being on a handful of dates w/girls who pretty much looked at it as a %26#039;free meal%26#039; etc... I%26#039;m more gunshy of paying. At least all the time. I now tend to look at it more like a %26#039;whoever asks someone out should pay%26#039; situation.



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